21 Jul 2007

Moaning for England!

Jessica the Rock Chick recently tagged me to answer a Moaning meme. I am not a huge fan of meme's but I made the exception as she asked so very nicely, it was hard to refuse!

The meme originated here and the questions are as follows :-

5 people who will be annoyed you tagged them.

Right I am going to 'cop-out' straight away. I hate to annoy people because I hate being annoyed - know what I mean?...I go out of my way NOT to annoy people most if the time. So I will chose to tag 5 people that should provide interesting answers...(some will be annoyed though...<snigger>)

Shelly - she's so busy this will really wind her up!
Jenny - she's not an anonymous boxer for nothing (except I know her name - doh!!)
Mrs Wibbs - she is so nice, I just want to see if she can actually moan at all?!
Crankybee - this lady is OLYMPIC standard!!Lol!
Any finally, who else but Chris H - yikes, ear plugs at the ready people..lol!!!

Hey, I've just noticed, they're all woman - what does that tell you.....(answers on a postcard boys!).

So with that over, let's begin....

4 things that should go into room 101 and be removed from the face of the earth.

1. International franchised retailers - companies that use a 'one size fits all' business model for every country and culture in the world. You are stamping on centuries of culture for pity sake, are you blind???? - BE GONE!

2. ALL shopping channels - mind rotting garbage - enough said.

3. Motorbikes, or more particularly motorcyclists - In their stupid bright leathers, they all think they are Valentino Rossi, they obey none of the rules I have to obey in a car - they ride like maniacs at speeds that would give most people a nose bleed whilst making a noise like Concord taking off and then have the utter cheek to accuse car drivers of not looking out for them when they get knocked off due to their own incredible levels of fuckwittery (sorry for the language cat lovers, I am warming to my theme).They are inconsiderate, arrogant, dangerous individuals who should be locked up for other peoples safety - my hatred of penis extensions (er don't you mean motorbikes) has got me in trouble before now and was fundamental to the reasons for me starting this blog (sorry to be slightly mysterious but I want to share the story another day). Anyway, I want to crush all their bikes into 6" blocks of scrap and make their former riders wear them around their necks as a medallion for the rest of their sorry lives..ahhh that feels better!

4. Tabloid newspapers - single-handedly that have reduced the national IQ to that of a very, very stupid plasterer.... Every time I see someone reading one, I have to fight the urge to run up to them, grab the rag and tear it to shreds before stamping on it. It is rotting the collective national intellect to such an extent that politics and debate are almost dead in the country - most of the mindless proles that read this tosh have to be told who to vote for every 4 years - it makes me VERY ANGRY in a mildly Buddhist sort of way....

3 things people do that make you want to shake them violently.

1. Talking in pyscho-gibberish business-speak. I used to have to attend meetings where we would indulge in 'blue sky thinking' and where we would seek to take things 'off-line' and be encouraged to 'sing from the same hymn sheet' - why can't people just say what they MEAN!

Also, why are all job titles so incomprehensible these days - it all started when Personnel became Human Resources and like a virus, the disease has spread (no offence to all you HR titans out there, but really, what HAVE you gone and done...) - I remember when we had a Managing Director who ran the place , now we have COO'S, CEO'S, CFO's - utter rubbish, just a load of self-aggrandising bollocks, excuse my french..!

If you want a good laugh, get a serious Sunday paper and check the job section - are these people on drugs??? Check this out if you don't believe me!

2. NOT INDICATING BEFORE MAKING A LANE CHANGE OR OTHER MANOEUVRE (sorry to shout...) - it completely does my nut in, the fact that people can drive around all day thinking that the act of alerting the rest of humanity to their future intentions is a compete waste of their time, so when driving in the UK, when you are not looking out for the Government Cash Machines, you spend your time trying to use psychic powers to determine the imminent movements of all the vehicles around you! Arrrrggh!

3. I know this is supposed to be light-hearted but racism drives me bonkers! I read this article recently and was gob-smacked to see that these sorts of archaic attitudes still exist - I just want to grab these people and make them see sense. I would love to change their skin colour for just one day and let them experience life on the other side....I am ashamed to walk the same planet...more information here from the BBC.

2 things you find yourself moaning about.

If I exclude work (I'd be here all night otherwise), I really try hard NOT to moan about stuff but in reality when push comes to shove I guess I tend to moan a lot about driving (other peoples that is) and the dastardly diet industry - I hate to see people spending money for things they could do themselves with a little encouragement!

1 thing the above answers tell you about yourself.

It tells me that the Dharma is a LONG way away.....oh dear.

Finally, deese em da rules....

  • Link to the original meme at freelancecynic.com so people know what it's all about!
  • Be as honest as possible, This is about letting people get to know the real you!
  • Try not to insult anyone - unless they really deserve it or are very, very ugly!
  • Post these rules at the end of every meme!


Chris H said...

NOPE, aint gunna do it mate... not doing any more Meme's eva, they piss me off mostly... I got better things to do.... like moan about stuff/people/bloggers who tag me! Sorry and all that ya pain in da bum. OH! And DO have a lovely day!

Jojo said...

you . want. to. crush. my. bike.
I am.....crushed.

FatBlokeThin said...

Hey JoJo, you KNOW I don't mean you, ladies of the road ROCK!

Do you own an R1 with full works race colours and feel the need to ride 1/8 of an inch off my tail at 85 miles an hour and then overtake against oncoming traffic and look at me like I'M ruining YOUR day?

No, I didn't think so - I think it's a man thing mostly - testosterone overload and all that!

Your bike is safe from the crusher - rest easy!

This is DEFINITELY the last meme I ever do! Phew!

Unknown said...

Your suggestion about having folks change skin color for awhile to get a view from the other side was actually the theme of a movie a while ago. I think it was called "Watermelon Man". It was actually quite interesting...

peace, Villager

The Rock Chick said...

Oh no! Not the tabloid magazines!!! I love them! They are my secret (ok, not so secret indulgence). I think the tabloids might be a little different here. Maybe not, they just chase celebrities around and take pics and write things the celebs all deny initially, but several months later prove to be true--most of the time anyway!!

I was away for the weekend and just catching up on my blog reading. I haven't read it yet, but I'm looking at the post on top and thinking "uh oh!"...checking it out now!

This was a great rant, by the way....RANTastic, even :)


Anonymous said...

I feel the same about Tabloid Newspapers. Except for the funny page. Can i keep that?

MammaMayMiller said...

Oh, no! No, no, no, no!! I'm not actually THAT nice, believe me. I can be plain nasty at times, just ask 'Hubby' ;o) I do try to be nice when I'm blogging though, cos I like making friends...hehehe.
Seriously, erm. Am not sure about this meme.
On the one hand, I find that, like many, it is so easy to get swept up in a wave of self-absorption and self-pity, and end up getting stuck in the 'woe is me' syndrome. Negative thoughts are so very destructive and they usually breed MORE negative thoughts, don't you think?? I have such a tendency to moan anyway, that I am worried that if I indulge here, it might take me down a path I don't want to go, and I'll end up depressing myself, and others too...
On the other hand - well, it's nice to get things off one's chest once in a while isn't it?? And thinking about it, there are lots and lots of things I see around me which make me wanna SCREAM!!!! There is such a thing as righteous (or: healthy/ holy/ godly)anger
after all, and there are certain injustices and situations which I'm rightly (I think) very passionate about.
So. Shall I do it, on the understanding that it'll be a platform for voicing some of my concerns, anger, anxieties about what's going on in and around me??
.....Watch this space!
Thanks for the compliment BTW. Did you get any boys sending you postcards, giving you answers to a certain Q you asked before lauching into your attack on various aspects of society...?????.........

MammaMayMiller said...

PS: sorry about the 'novel', I can get quite wordy at times...You have my permission to tell me to shut up.

Anonymous said...

Ha, well ive got to admit that that was a proper moan, i thought i could moan but you take some beating, i will have to write a post about you on my blog, cheers,Mick...